Do not sugar-coat your words

Image by WikimediaImages from Pixabay

In the last 5-10 years I have been losing my hair. It started as a little bald spot on the top of my head, which grew and was later joined by a second smaller one on the back of my head. It’s actually not that easy to spot when you look in the mirror, but from behind or above, the hair loss is obvious. I could have painted a big H in the spot and used it as a helipad for small drones. When I became aware of it, I simply decided to just get rid of it all with a clipper, because it was NOT a flattering look. Instead, I let my beard grow out. I have been visiting my barber regularly for at least five years, and I have listened to and followed their advice on what kind of hair- and beard cut I should rock. But a week ago, my wife started to read up on men’s hairstyle and bald shaving. She suspected that I would look much better if we chose the razor instead of the clipper the next time it was time to trim the hair. So, we did it, and oh boy what an upgrade it was!

From what I understand, a buzz-cut can be appropriate for balding men but it depends on how you are balding. If you simply have a receding hairline, the buzz-cut can be very nice. But in my case, with completely bald spots, the buzz cut does not work as good. Because the bald spots will still be visible, even with the clippers set to 1 mm. In that case, the razor might be the better option. I don’t visit my barber as often nowadays, because we live far away from the city. We used to be city dwellers, and then a quick drop-in to the barber was easy. Therefore, my wife has started to learn how to style my hair – and even my beard too. It is in both of our interests that I look my best. Last weekend, we grabbed a Gillette cartridge razor and got to work. I could instantly tell that this new look felt a lot more like “me” than the buzz-cut. It was obvious and it felt so right.

A note on cartridge razors by the way… They suck! They are very expensive, and they are way worse than regular razors. Those 3- or 5-layered razors are just for show. It’s probably just the first of the five blades that cuts anyway. Instead, I bought my first safety razor a couple of days ago and when we did the shave again this weekend, it was a lot better. I have never experienced such a smooth surface after a shave. And the blade cost is perhaps 10X cheaper in the long run. I’m never using a cartridge again, no way. However, the first thing I noticed with the new hair style is how much colder it feels. I had like 1 mm of buzz-cut before, but the clean shave is like putting your head inside the freezer in comparison. I’m amazed by how big difference it makes having just a little hair compared to none at all. I have noticed this effect before when comparing beard / no beard, but in the case a shaven head, the difference feels extreme. Anyway, everything is always a compromise, and I will gladly choose a colder, but better-looking head over a warmer head with bald spots. It’s a hairless no-brainer.

One thing that I am a bit surprised by though, is that during all these years, none of my barbers have ever suggested that I should go for the shaved bald look. I do not know why, but my guess is that they are afraid to hurt my feelings because men losing their hair can apparently be an extremely sensitive topic? Could that be the case? I surely hope so, because if not, then I must have been going to the wrong barber. Instead, the barbers usually ask me what style I would like, and I trusted them to provide adequate guidance. When I leave my car to the workshop mechanic, I don’t want him to ask me what kind of service he should provide. I just want him to service the car in the most appropriate way and return it to me so that I can keep driving. Analogously, a barber is a consultant providing a service. He is the expert and should be able to determine what style that is most beneficial to my appearance. The guy with a helipad on the head (me), clearly did not have the required expertise regarding hair style.

I know it might not work for everyone, but if you are ever talking to me, please tell me the truth without filters! If my hairstyle looks horrible and you have the expertise to help me out – then say it. I very much appreciate people who are honest. One of the most annoying things I know of, is people who sugar-coat their words. That will hurt my feelings a lot more than the truth.