Rules for thee but not for me

To be a good father, i.e., a proper role model, is exceptionally difficult. I have been thinking hard about some very difficult questions for the past month or so, and it feels as if my brain is about to melt. As I observe my boys growing up, I am obviously worried about some of the destructive elements of western culture that they will encounter sooner or later. The best wisdom to follow here is of course “practice what you preach”. The kids couldn’t care less about what I tell them to do if I don’t act it out myself first.

Parenting, PhilosophyRikard ÖqvistJune 20, 2023parenting, father, kids, addiction, screen timeComment

The easiest decision I have ever made

What is the red line that turns you into an alcoholic? This question implies that there is a healthy level of consumption that has zero or positive effect on your total life outcome. Maybe there is such a thing, I do not know. I have been thinking a lot about these questions in the past months, and not just with alcohol but with any activity that can become an addiction. I like to use alcohol as my primary thought experiment, because I embraced a complete booze celibacy in early 2019. And I base that decision on that I cannot conceive any way, shape or form that my total life outcome improves because of alcohol consumption. No matter how I approach the subject, I come out with the same conclusion; that I am better off – all things included – by abstaining.

Food & Drink, Parenting, PhilosophyRikard ÖqvistMarch 20, 2023drugs, addiction, parenting, alcoholComment

How to mask a bad habit

A couple of years ago, when I was living in the city, I used to ride the bus to work. My destination was one station beyond the city´s primary bus station - Vasaplan. When the bus arrived at Vasaplan, the driver turned off the engine and waited for a couple of minutes before continuing the route. Sometimes, there were people talking with each other or on their phones, but you could usually never hear them in the noisy bus. But as soon as the engine sound vanished, the environment got quiet and you could instantly hear every word in the nearby conversation. And as soon as the bus continued its route, the background noise came back and consequently the conversation became inaudible. This is a perfect example of a phenomenon called “sound masking”.

PhilosophyRikard ÖqvistMarch 13, 2023habits, alcohol, addiction, dogs, walking, evilComment

Is learning painful?

I used to think that you can acquire knowledge in two ways. For the most part, you learn something new – a building block – that can be added to your existing framework. Just like an additional piece of a puzzle. But sometimes you would come across new knowledge that was incompatible with your existing framework, and consequently you had to tear down a small or big part of your explanation model of the world and replace it with an improved explanation model. The first part is effortless, and the second part is somewhat painful. In rare cases, you can learn something new that flips your entire puzzle over and forces you to start anew. No wonder there is a saying that “ignorance is bliss”.

Philosophy, EducationRikard ÖqvistMarch 7, 2023learning, habits, knowledge, addictionComment

Conversations reveal solutions

Last week I had a call with my nurse, a routine thing because I recently turned 40 years old. I had left some test samples and answered a lengthy questionnaire regarding just about every topic regarding my physical and mental health. Or Body and Soul, which are the terms I would prefer. In the questionnaire, one of the topics was “Is there anything in your life that you want to reduce?” or something similar. My gut response was screen time. I spend way too much time behind screens and just a little while of free thought here and there would make a huge difference. When talking with my nurse for an hour, I cracked an idea that is ridiculously simple on how to achieve it. Isn’t it fascinating how you can often find solutions to your problems yourself as soon as you articulate and define your problem to someone else?

Diary, Photography, PhilosophyRikard ÖqvistOctober 10, 2022soul, mind, addiction, screen time, dogs, walkingComment